Creating Harmonic Relationships

Aloha beautiful souls,

Who doesn’t want a have a long-lasting love relationship?

When people ask me “how have you had a lasting love relationship for 35 years,” this is what I share with them.

Clear communication is the secret to harmonious relationships.

Communicate with Yourself ~ Listen to your Inner Voice

Our inner voice is always with us in every moment; the positive, the negative and everything in-between. We are, in a sense, stuck with ourselves. To have a lasting love relationship with others, we must love ourselves. Ask yourself, “what kind of lasting relationship with myself do I want?”  It’s a choice we all get to make.

Sometimes communicating with ourselves feels like a tug of war. For example; “If I eat this, I will get fat!” Or, “If I eat this, I will savor every bite!”  “I don’t know what to do!” Or “I’m feeling so good about my decision.” When your inner voice is at war, the best thing to do is… STOP the CRAZINESS! I do this by taking a long walk in Nature. I breathe and remind myself of what matters. I listen to the inner voice that says, “walk longer to compensate,” not the one that says, “If you eat this you will get fat!” Then I can enjoy what I eat rather than beat myself up. When a negative self-sabotaging thought arises, communicate with yourself with kindness. Being comfortable in your own skin is essential.

Our thoughts create our emotions. What we focus on grows.

It takes time and courage, to be honest, quiet our mind and let our hearts speak.  Sometimes, we need to ask ourselves, just like we ask others, be quiet. Allow yourself to be forthright. If anyone can understand what is going on inside you, it’s yourself.

Let’s be honest. Sometimes we get down on ourselves. We can feel rotten, empty, and lost if we do not follow our hearts and dreams. When self-sabotaging thought arises, and negative voices try to barge their way in, change your environment. Remove yourself from the situation. Take time out. Aggressive conflicting voices come from somewhere: your mother, father, ex-lover, or perhaps a teacher who made you feel dumb. Addictions, bad habits, negative thoughts, and old patterns can get the best of us. When our self-love inner voice is strong and healthy, we can communicate to the destructive voices and drown them out! If you have not yet read my Self-Love Blog It all starts with how we communicate within. A loving relationship with ourselves makes everything easier. When we build a strong relationship with our truth and goodness, we have a deep connection with our passions and purpose. The more love we have for ourselves, the more we can love others.

When you listen to your loving inner voice, you become your highest self.

Communicate with Others

Creating long-lasting relationships is a commitment to communication. It takes doing the work. Communication can be hard, but it’s WORTH the effort. A long-term love relationship has a better chance of lasting when we are transparent and share our feelings from our hearts. When we come from a place of genuine love both parties can thrive.

I’ve been with my wonderful husband, Kevin, for over 35 years. He has been my business partner, lover, and best friend. Friends and clients ask me how we have been able to stay together for so long. My answer is we do three things — communicate — communicate — communicate.

We communicate with love, trust, and honesty.

True love makes allowances for another’s weaknesses. It may bring conflict at first, but we get to the core of the issues. We do not give up. We communicate.

If you want to create healthy long-lasting relationships with others, then show up with your honest inner voice. It’s essential to respect and acknowledge how the other person feels. Honor where they are, and for showing up. Trust in the process and be a good listener. Communicate with your eyes and energy. We do this best when we feel centered and present and love ourselves. 

Yes, sometimes the other voices inside need to be heard, but NOT all the time. No one can stand to hear and experience negativity from another for too long. This does not set the stage for a long-lasting healthy relationship. Yes, express how you feel and what you’re thinking, but a loving relationship comes with doing your work on yourself, rather than dumping it all on someone else. Yes, be there for each other. If you or your partner are burdened with extra baggage, get help from others or a professional. Communicate honestly with your partner that you are seeking help. It’s important for both parties to be heard. Every relationship is an exchange of energy — a give and take.

Relationships are an investment. You provide each other with your time and energy. When you nourish each other, you both get a return on your investment. Long-term investments that pay off give us security. With security, we have more freedom. Freedom and love are what most of us value the most. I sure do!

Whether it be a person or the environment, if you do not nurture it, it will erode or vanish forever.

Communication With Your Environment

How we treat ourselves and others has a direct effect on the environment. If we pollute our body and mind with toxins, we pollute our Earth. If our livelihood adds to the problems and not the solutions, that is a problem. Almost everyone knows humans have a direct impact on environmental devastation. It is more critical than ever to have a long lasting, love relationship with ourselves, and our Earth.

Earth justice needs to go beyond what we are doing. We must act faster than ever before. United, as a voice for Nature we have a greater capacity to be effective. When we honor and express our compassionate inner voice, we have a more significant impact.

A long-lasting love relationship with ourselves, others, and the environment can change the world.

Accept who you are and love every aspect of yourself, embrace your gifts and uphold your values.


Thank you all so much for reading 🙂

If you have not downloaded your free 80-page preview of my upcoming memoir, click on the photo below. You will discover in more detail how I learned how to be the happiest person I know. Gratitude and love have shown me the way.

Mahalo to all of you who have taken the time to preview and provided me with valuable feedback. If you’ve missed any of my other blogs you can find them on my author’s website here:

Sending you big love and aloha!

Have an amazing day.

Big Love ~ Mama Donna

Spread the love